Steve Becker, LCSW: Love’s Mirage: Is Your Narcissistic Husband Wasting Your Life?



Years ago, I wrote lyrics to a song. I called it In Love.  It was a song about unrequited love — the kind of love that yearns and yearns, but is not returned.

My love for you is a fool’s mirage / What else am I to think? / With you I’m in a desert, dry / Without a sip to drink

Back then, I didn’t know about THE CRAZY-MAKING HUSBAND. Now that I do, I realize that love with TC-MH, especially when he’s a narcissist, is a mirage. The mirage which over and over you step toward, hopeful, imaging love is there, only to find nothing but the same old sand on which your feet have been standing all along.

As today’s Guest Expert, Licensed Clinical Social Worker Steve Becker will show you, love with a narcissist is imaginary — love, like a mirage, that is not — and cannot — be real. A regular columnist at, Steve is an expert on narcissism and sociopathy.

Steve Becker is a licensed clinical social worker with a fulltime private psychotherapy practice in Westfield, NJ. With an undergraduate degree from the University of Pennsylvania and a Masters degree in Social Work from New York University, he is a featured columnist at, a website dedicated to educating and supporting victims of sociopathic and exploitative partners. For much more information on Steve, or to contact him, please visit his website at